My Journey in Islam is Transforming

Prior to joining The Nation of Islam, I voiced what I wanted for my life and I had an exhausting list of questions that were hard to find answers for. So when I attended my first lecture on Sunday, January 12, 2014, it was shocking to see and hear some of what I wanted for my life and to receive answers to questions I had for years. It only took one meeting to plant seeds in the womb of my mind and heart. No, I wasn’t sure about joining just yet, but I knew I wanted more. It was a lot to process. Could this all be too good to be true?

Following a couple of weeks, I decided to take a trip to the mosque. This time I attended my first processing M.G.T. & G.C.C., Muslim Girls in Training & General Civilization Class on Saturday, January 25, 2014 and returned to the Sunday meeting on January 26 to hear Sister Ava Muhammad. It was nice to see and hear a Black woman speak so freely on what she believed in, in such a civilized and confident way. The spirit and the manner in which she delivered the message resulted in me joining The Nation of Islam and I have not looked back since. From there, I worked hard to understand the prerequisites of The Teachings of The Most Honorable Elijah Muhammad. Later that year, I became a registered member of The Nation of Islam on September 20, 2014.

After eighth grade, I was moving to a mindset that no longer wanted to be in the close company of women. There were girls who backstabbed me and I felt as if I could no longer trust women, but I knew it wasn’t best to take men as “close” friends either. I knew that there was power in women coming together, but I wasn’t sure if that was possible for my life. Being in the processing class opened my eyes to a powerful sisterhood. The way I observed the processing instructors, it made me see the beauty in women collaborating and being one united front. My work as an empowerment coach now meant so much more then just some thing I was doing. Listen to the full interview here.

So when I walked into the registered M.G.T. Class, I was very grateful for being chosen by Allah to be considered as His girl who is being refined. Not only am I becoming a better individual, I am collectively aiding in the betterment of the condition of this world. The world will not improve, until the woman is uplifted. A nation can rise no higher than its woman, so if I’m not being elevated, I understand that it’s best to remove myself from potentially detrimental situations. I am the standard. We the M.G.T. are the standard and Insha’Allah (God Willing), we will be pleasing to The Most High.

StudentBeing the standard is easy to say, but it’s not easy to grasp what this means in totality. If we are truly the standard, which we are, then this implies that there’s a lot of work that must be done. 75% of work is with the woman. As much as I can recall, the woman has always been on the frontline working, alongside the man and without the man. Being the Second Self of Allah (God), we make no excuses. We work even when we’re tired and through the pain. This work requires an ongoing study. Can a woman who does not study say that she is fulfilling God’s Will? I know an M.G.T. cannot. In the very title is a reminder that we must train and be in class. So to be an M.G.T., we must humble ourselves to always be a student. I am always thankful to say and show that I am a student of The Most Honorable Elijah Muhammad under the divine guidance of The Honorable Minister Louis Farrakhan.

I am thankful to The Honorable Minister Louis Farrakhan for standing firm in his Islam and in The Mission to resurrect the dead. Had it not been for The Minister, I would not know about The Nation of Islam or our true history that is not shared in this world’s educational system. Most of all, The Minister has helped me embrace who I am, all of me, the duality of me that most could not stand to receive a glimpse of. One of the many of gifts that he’s given is Self-Improvement: The Basis for Community Development study guides, which has been a tremendous aid. Throughout his stand as the representative of his teacher, The Most Honorable Elijah Muhammad, he has reminded us of the importance of resurrection (killing the devil and raising the god within). No matter how much I tried to improve myself elsewhere, I was also searching for more because I was never feeding from The Source. It is The Teachings that have allowed me to continue becoming who I am supposed to be. I can never thank this beautiful man, who has sacrificed himself for humanity. Referring to him as a humble man is the least.

As my personal testimony, I must share that The Minister’s profound statement, “Pain is the mother of creativity” is one that has helped me most. Accepting Allah (God) and declaring to Him that I want to serve in The Mission of raising the dead is not easy, especially when the first dead that has to rise is you. And then after you’ve been raised, while you’re bringing more home, there is always more work to be done with the person in the mirror. Raising the dead in us is an ongoing task. It’s one that I don’t want to stop and wouldn’t have the option to opt-out of, if I wanted. As I’m continuing to learn that self-improvement is painful, I’m also learning that it’s purifying. Trials are purifying and just as painful as it is to become one with Allah, it’s just as ugly to look at others in their pain sometimes. I’m not sorry for saying that. I’m keeping it real. We can all be some ugly people. I’m learning that just as ugly as I can be in my healing process, others around me are just as ugly. This understanding is helping me be more forgiving to myself and anyone that has possibly caused me an ounce of pain. The reality is that we cause pain on ourselves more than we like to point the finger. People are not perfect and this includes the people who follow Allah (God). Islam is perfect though. Islam is the be all. Look at the word, “ISlam”. It’s like BElam. Okay, I’m corny, but I hope you see the point I’m making.

Overall in life, which Islam is a way of life, we are constantly being tried because everyday there is a test to pass/past (excel in and move forward). I used to hate test, especially pop quizzes. Now, my goal is to take the test and take my time through it. I’m in no rush. I am in the class of God and I have a lot to learn about Him and myself. Instead of asking “why me” or “why this test required”, I am thanking Allah that He still sees me as worthy and I am continuing to purify my heart, so that my mind can be prepared and so that my actions align with my mental and spiritual being. My Islam is transforming and I understand that this is an ongoing process for me and those surrounding me, so I’m covered with Allah’s armor, so that I can put forth my all.

Sister Sharanda Died Three Times to Live

Prior to joining The Nation of Islam, I’d been having visions into future experiences. I am and always am destined to be spiritually inclined. I believed in a higher being or divinity, however I believe in The All. As a spiritual teacher, Jesus left principles that are worth adhering to. I understand when they ask Jesus how do you pray, he answered you pray unto the father. I pray only to The Creator, my sustenance comes through The All.

You are not taught to pray to be heard by Moses and other prophets, not even Elijah whom they say went to Heaven whole soul and body. If Elijah cannot hear a prayer and he was not killed as Jesus was, then how can Jesus hear a prayer? We must not pray to dead prophets. They can’t hear our prayers.
The Muslim loves all of Allah’s prophets, but we will not pray for life to come to us from a dead prophet; not even to Muhammad who lived nearly 1,400 years ago. We pray in the name of Allah and mention the name of His last prophet in our prayer as an honor and thanks to Allah for His last guide to us.
– The Most Honorable Elijah Muhammad, Day of Resurrection of Dead So-Called Negroes Has Arrived (Reprint from Our Saviour Has Arrived)

The vision before I accepted was of my death 3 times. Did I die? In the last one, I cried out to Jesus and in the vision I said no “Allah”. I awoke confused of this vision, but it brought about an intense craving to read and learn. Thus, for months I did nothing but read all of the books I could find. I did not sleep – my family a woke and slept and each time they found me reading.

“When he is [you are] taught the spirit of truth, He will guide you into all truth.”
– The Honorable Minister Louis Farrakhan, The Crucifixion of Jesus

Next, I went through tremors and shaking when something moved me to my core, as confirmation that I was receiving truth. To say this is Divine intervention is correct. So much synchronicity happened in my life; it initially started when I came to America. I was meant to be here – Destiny would have it no other way.

The power of thought, as manifested through the Law of Synchronicity and The Theology of Time, projects all things coming to pass in the appropriate moment and place.
– Mother Tynetta Muhammad, A Picture is Worth a Thousands Words (article)

An MGT in The Nation of Islam is a woman knowing and accepting that all possibilities are open for me, I can accomplish what I will. That I am my own ruler. I design my fate according to my actions and deeds and first and foremost to do no harm. It means to me that I have accepted peace from within myself, from Allah no force can break. It means to me that the oneness of Allah is all I need.

Allah is sufficient for me—there is no God but He. On Him do I rely, and He is the Lord of the mighty Throne. (Holy Qur’an 9:128-129)

Being in The Nation of Islam, I am blessed to say I have not come across many challenges. My family at first questioned why, but let it go, because of love and tolerance for each other. Friends have not questioned my faith. One went as far as saying, I knew your spiritual path would take you where you wanted to be. She said and I quote:

“You are an all or nothing type of person.”

I may have died three times in a vision, but it saved me. Islam is Life.


Interested in knowing some of the books I read during this time:

  • At the beginning, I was guided to Psalm and completed this Book in The Bible.
  • I read Hermès Trice The Great twice
  • Dare to Believe by Mary Rowland
  • The Secret of Freemasonry by Elijah Muhammad
  • The Secret to Perfect Living by James Mangan
  • The Holy Qur’an
  • Study Guide 19: by The Honorable Minister Louis Farrakhan
  • The God Tribe of Shabazz
  • The Genesis Years (unpublished and rare writing)
  • The Motherplane by The Most Honorable Elijah Muhammad
  • The Book of Enoch
  • Books on Aristotle, Plato, and Osho

Muslim Women’s Day: Sisters in The Nation of Islam

ProfessionallyI’m in marketing and was offended when a story in the pipeline for Muslim Women’s Day got delayed because “it’s not a widely-known holiday”. Because I’m taught to rise above emotions into the thinking of God, I realized that it is my responsibility to spread the Good News and represent as a Muslim woman. I don’t need to wait on anyone or expect anyone else to do the work. I will say, I am happy my job will share a story on a Muslim woman. It’s just that comment was an ouch that I turned into an opportunity.

Documented Journey covered eight stories of eight beautiful sisters who are embracing their Islam. Sit back in your chair and join us on our journeys.

* My Journey in Islam is TransformingSister Zakiyyah Maryam’s Islam is ResilientAllah’s love for His girl, Sister Terrika MuhammadI Am Covered Through TrialsSister Fatimah: The RevolutionaryWearing a garment is naturally beautifulSister Sharanda Died Three Times to LiveWho and what is your reflection?


Thank you for visiting Documented Journey.

I Live – Poem

What I’m going to share is not my story alone. Your story is mine, my story is yours. So I ask: as I share my experience, will you reflect on self?


*****

I am beginning to appreciate the Cycles of Life.

Allah wrote on my heart last night, I felt His presence so clearly.

He imprinted His mind on mine and I received it all in a dream.

I woke up and realized what Allah was showing me. He gifted me with The Bee to say the least. He reminded me of all of the reasons to live.

He gives me purpose when I feel as if there’s none left for me. He told me to stop asking “how” but to remember the mission and get right to work because it’s a remedy for healing illnesses. Diving into the work provides direction. I bear witness. It recharges you and gives life when it feels as if there’s nothing left. The work fuels you. Being in your presence fuels me and if I come in with my Higher Power, then I too, can fuel you.

And I desire that reciprocity, for us to be a reflection of one another. We are His children, so let’s mirror what that means.

••••

Selfless when it comes to serving God. Because although this is my life to live, my life is not mine. I am all for God. And God is love, so I’m living because interchangeable to love is to live. So I had to (re)learn how to love me again. This new found love enabled me to live again. But do you understand that I partially had to die for this rebirth to love and live again? Understand, that I say again because killing doubt, ego, fear, insecurities, and vain is an everyday process.

••••

I’ve come to realize that we are always in the womb, a stage in our development that brings forth our reality, a new chapter on our journey of life. This journey is an awakening path. And on this path I had to learn from The Minister that, “pain is the mother of creativity”, so I had to reflect on the illnesses that Allah permitted, but I caused.

••••

It was like starting over from the womb. I had to go back to a dark place, I had to put myself in a confined space. All I could hear and feel was Allah. All third parties had to be removed. It was just me and Allah. And honestly, I did not like this place or the pace in which God and I were co-existing. Everything seemed to be too slow. I was becoming impatient. My impatience led to me becoming a sick patient.

Due to my ignorance of not wanting to endure the pregnancy phase, I began to lose the critical aspects of my development because I aborted the process. The 9 stages. I need all 9 to aim towards completeness to become one with Allah, to be whole again. But my pain brought me back to life.

••••

I made a commitment to take care of self first. And stop doing the most for others. I had to arrange the line of duty in the right order.

I turned the TV off to see my reality clear. My life became crystallized and my need for crystals vanished because I was able to activate my crystals within.

But in order for me to keep them charged, I had to remember that I’m dependent, so I submitted to God. And my love for Him prepared me for the battlefield. His armor helped me confront my trials. And when I got through them, this time I wasn’t broken. Instead, I was renewed. Transformed for His cause.

••••

I have another problem. When I learn, I like to give. You see? I give as I receive. But I’m learning as I receive, I shall pause for I, for me. Just as I need to parse words, I need to parse the moment. When I’m done sharing a piece that God gave to me, I’m going to take part in a moment of solitude, which has “I” before “U” in the word solitude with lit before the u.

See I need to spark a fire in myself first, in order to be So LIT. So-lit-tude. That probably went over your heard. But basically, if I don’t see myself as light then no one else will.

So my selah moments lift me. Selah just means praise and meditation. So my Selah moments lift me. So when people say “there is no cure for that”, I tell them, don’t use that dead language around me. You + Allah is your own cure, but you gotta spark that mustard seed by putting your faith to work.

Blessed doesn’t mean that I won’t be a mess… In fact it’s because of my mess, that I am blessed. Misfortunes are my fortunes. The way you challenge me shows me my challenged self. So please encourage me when you see I’m off. And I’ll do the same for you. Cause when together, we reflect our Higher Self… Flying like the bee…

••••

Can I talk about my totem with you? The bee. The bee is my spiritual totem. A totem, is similar to a spirit animal, but on a higher plane.

According to science, bees are not supposed to be able to fly, like the Black man and woman are not supposed to rise. The wings of a bee are not supposed to be able to lift the weight of their body. Our knowledge is not supposed to be able to lift the masses of the people. But, like the bee who has its wings, we have our wings. Protect your temple. Use your crown as the wings to free yourself as the bee does.

••••

BUT in order to reach this freedom:

You gotta start over from the womb. Go back to a dark place, put yourself in a confined space. Hear and feel Allah. Remove all third parties. Just you and Allah. And honestly, you may not always like this place or the pace in which God and you coexist. Everything may seem too slow. You may become impatient, but don’t become a sick patient.

Endure the pregnancy phase. Enjoy your development. It’s a process of 9 stages. You need all 9 to aim towards completeness to become one with Allah, to be whole again.

If you nurture the trimesters, you will give birth to a god. That’s you a new god. Your pain will bring you back to life. And instead of coexisting with God, you will live with Him. Don’t just exist. Live. Understand your purpose, take care of you, so that you may heal the community.

••••

Allah wrote on my heart last night, I felt His presence so clearly.

He imprinted His mind on mine and I received it all in a dream.

I woke up and realized what Allah was showing me. I parsed my learnings in moments of solitude. And then I gave (right now) what I received to you.

I am beginning to appreciate the Cycles of Life.


My Second Degree Burn Testimony & Spiritual Burnout Story

If someone was to burn you would you thank them? Can you see the beauty in your injury/scars?

In the video you’ll hear me refer to the burn as third degree, but after reviewing the pictures, I think it was a second degree burn. Nevertheless, the experience still counts.

Watch the video to hear how the burn has changed my life:

From Christian to Muslim: Former Rapper Loon Shares His Story

Do you remember Loon? He was a rapper signed to Sean Diddy Comb’s Bad Boy Records, who moved on to have his own label. Soon after he was convicted of conspiracy with intent to traffic kilos of heroin and sentenced to jail for 14 years. Although, he was innocent, as most Black men are, he served his time while never complaining. Below is a snippet of awakening moments as he shares his story of struggle to spiritual success titled “The Wake Up Call”.

“I was surrounded by drugs, I was surround by violence, I was surrounded by crime, this was a lifestyle that I endured by default. It wasn’t my choice. By default. And today, some of the Brothers and Sisters try to incorporate this into an understanding that is so pure and that purity in simplicity is Islam. I spent a huge percentage of my life in darkness, doing for many years what I thought was right, but to become a Muslim and find out that I was spending 24-hours of my day, consistently everyday, involving myself and indulging in all of the major sins that are prohibited (timeframe of video: 11:00 – 11:57).

I was searching for something and Allah guided me to Islam, but dig this? You were born this way… Growing up you know as a Christian, I had certain suspicions when I was young. ‘Cause I used to spend 6 days a week in the church… I was tired, I had to sit there and watch these people sing all day. I remember I used to go to Bible studies. I remember just repeatedly kept hearing about Jesus praying… So I remember asking my pastor, I said ‘Pastor, I need to ask you a question’. He said, ‘what’s the problem son’?:

Q: If Jesus is God and he’s praying. Who’s he praying to?

And he just shut me down.

“Boy, you don’t believe Jesus Christ is your Lord and Saviour”? I’m like calm down. He was just about to beat me down. I’m a little kid, I’m like 8/9-years-old. But it was a legitimate question and you got me at Bible Study, so eventually, I’m going to come across this. Anyone who is there for the right reasons; you know not just there ’cause grandma is saying or just there because you have to be there. I was learning things myself. And I started to see certain things that just didn’t make sense. And he just kinda shut me down. From that point, I never went to church again. I said to myself,

I’m just going to believe in God ’cause whoever Jesus is praying to that’s The Man.

That’s The Man ’cause I tried to pray to Jesus and I can’t say the response time was always on time… But I know when I used to scream “Oh My God”, it seemed like something was working. And I knew that there was only One Creator and Islam made all of this clear to me.”

-Amir Junaid Muhadith (formerly known as Loon), watch below at 30:19 – 32

I Love Me: a checklist for loving self

When is the last time you said “I love you”?

Not to anyone else. When was the last time you said ‘I love me’?

What have you done to show your love for self today?

We’re going to go through a series of questions and I want you to reflect on the answers. I mean really take some time to study you! Take some time to watch the video for specifics.

  • How are you caring for yourself today?
  • Have you looked at yourself like you look at your crush?
  • Did you really look at yourself in the mirror today?
  • Did you lotion yourself today?
  • Did you take some time to condition your hair? Yes, brother you too!
  • Did you clean your space?
  • What did you feed yourself today?
  • How are you healing yourself?
  • Did you right a wrong?
  • How are you putting yourself first?
  • How are you fighting for you?
  • How are you advocating for you?
  • What are you going to work on today to make progress towards a goal?
  • Do you have a bulletin with your vision boards on there?
  • Did you pray today?
  • Did you have a moment of solitude? A moment of silence? A moment with only you and God? Your Higher Power?
  • Did you you place your hand over your heart to understand your pace today?
  • Did you affirm yourself?
  • Did you smile?
  • Did you hug yourself today?

Questions specifically for sisters

  • When’s the last time you admired your natural hair? 
    • Brothers, did you rub that bald head of yours? I’m serious, rub your fade. Your fro. Those locks. Rub your hair, Rub your fingers through those locs, whatever you got.
  • Did you do your hair, even if it’s covered?
  • When’s the last time you wore zero make-up and looked at yourself like oh my god!
  • Have you talked to your womb today? Pregnant or not?

There are so many other questions that can be added. This is just a start. Watch the video for reflections. 


Honestly, I enjoyed recording this video because we are so far from loving ourselves. I hope and pray we get back to internal peace and love.

What is the mustard seed in your life that exemplifies faith?

The following text is from a speech delivered during the youth study group at The Final Call Administration Building in Chicago, Illinois on June 21, 2017.


In the name of Allah, The Beneficent, The Merciful, I bear witness that there is no God, but Allah and that Muhammad is His Messenger.

I greet my beautiful Brothers and Sisters in the Arabic language of peace, As-Salaam Alaikum, Ramadan Mubarak!

I first thank The Honorable Minister Louis Farrakhan, His National Assistant Brother Ishmael Muhammad, and Brother Fontaine Muhammad for allowing me this opportunity to come before the People of God. Last, I thank you for being here willing to listen.

Today, I want you to think about what your mustard seed is.

As a recap in The Bible,

Matthew 17:20

And He replied, “Because you have so little faith. Truly I tell you, if you have faith as small as a mustard seed, you can say to this mountain, ‘Move from here to there,’ and it will move. Nothing will be impossible for you.”

Think of the mountain that’s in your life that needs to moved. Get rid of it! How? with your mustard seed. We know in The Bible it’s consistently reminding us to have faith. So what is the mustard seed in your life that exemplifies faith? Mine is affirmation.

Coming into The Nation of Islam, I realized everything was affirming me as Black.

Affirm means to confirm.

Let’s take a look at the last sentence of the Preface in Message To The Blackman:

“The reader will find that light in this book.”

It’s confirming that the reader will find guidance and truth. The key word here is reader, which means you have to be open to reading and studying what even may be unfamiliar to you.

Another definition for affirm is to express agreement with or commitment to; uphold; support.

So as we’re learning about ourselves, if we accept. That means that we’re agreeing with the confirmation and once we agree, we have a duty and responsibility to uphold.

There is a chapter titled “Accept Your Own and Be Yourself” in Message To The Blackman.

As a Black woman, I hadn’t been taught to accept me or to be myself. Not just as a woman, but no one around me was telling me to love myself for being Black. They would say, love you, but I hadn’t specifically had anyone to say love your Black self. In fact, I was on my way toward being an actress as an escape from me being me and as a way of focusing on everyone else, except self, and most of those characters had nothing to do with my history. Like Anne Frank, and Me. Here I am learning about The Jews. Where were my people that I could represent?

The Honorable Elijah Muhammad said,

“Your black skin is the best, and never try changing it’s color.” 

So yes color in this context The Messenger is referring to our skin. However, color has another definition.

Color: to give a special character or distinguishing quality to
Skin: it’s the external covering, it’s a shell

Well, let’s say your mind is in a shell. Which means that “your black skin”… let’s say “your black mind is the best and never try changing it’s color, it’s characteristics of being Black, the Original Man.” So now I’m taking on the color (characteristics) of God, Who is Black. I’m looking at my Black self and no longer taking on any roles of someone else. I look in the mirror and say I am Black. I accept and love my Black self.

So why is affirmation the mustard seed in my life that exemplifies faith? Because we are students first. In order for us to come into the knowledge of self, we must read. In Closing The Gap on page 104, The Honorable Minister Louis Farrakhan says,

“The more we study, our thoughts will change and grow from what we thought and believe and understood yesterday to that which is closer to the thinking of Allah.”

So affirmation is the mustard seed in my life that exemplifies faith because feeding my mind on His Word just a little bit increases what I say I believe in, grows me closer to God and it brings me closer to my true self, taking on His color, His attributes and characteristics. It allows me to look at self and make necessary corrections.

The Nation is affirming because I am constantly working to renew my mind. [It’s actually what I’m held responsible for. As a member in The Nation of Islam, we are committing ourselves to actively being a part of a movement. That means, we must move because we have work to do and the work starts with our mind.]

Whatever you have in your mind is what you’ll think. Thoughts are transferred into words. And thoughts become things. Every time you speak, you project your next steps because thoughts go into the Universe. Just as God said “Be and it is”. [We too can say be and it is, but we must have faith to bring it forth.]

I know I’ve been talking about words, but they matter more than we think. We also can’t be lip professors. Remember affirm means to confirm and to commit. So my mustard seed proves that faith without works is dead. When we pray, we have to have faith in that prayer, but then we have to go to work. After prayer, after furthering your knowledge, you then have to go to work to apply what you learned and said you believe in.

So when you’re communicating, when we’re communicating, let’s pay close attention to the language we’re using. Ex. When you listen to The Most Honorable Elijah Muhammad, you notice he said “so-called Negro”. Let’s make sure we aren’t taking away the “so-called” when we speak. [He is very intentional in his language and as his students so shall we be.]

Where there is tearing, there is building. This world is trying to tear us down, but we are the builders. We’re going to build one another up. In fact we are already building one another. Where there is correction, there’s improvement. We need to correct our language because it’s a reflection of where you stand in your faith. Let’s strengthen our faith so we can unite. Self-Improvement is The Basis of CommUNITY Development. So let’s get to work on us first, so we can help one another.

On the Ramadan Prayerline, The Honorable Minister Louis Farrakhan said, “I Can do it. I Must do it and I Will do it.” Let’s take this affirmation beyond Ramadan.

You are waiting on God, but really it’s the god in you that you’re waiting on because The God is present today and He’s already in you.

A presenter on The Ramadan Prayerline said,

“The only obstacle is the obstacle we create for ourselves”.

So stop getting in your way. You are a walking mustard seed and it’s time for each and everyone of us to accept our purpose and responsibility. When you put your faith and trust in Allah, the mountains will be moved.

I close with jewels from The Honorable Minister Louis Farrakhan:

“What Jesus wanted us to do is go back in our mind and analyze our thoughts ‘cause that’s the real you, as a man thinketh, so is he. So if we cannot correct the way we think, then we have really missed in the work of reformation of raising the consciousness of Black people and making a better people, a better world. We will never make a better world until you make human beings to think on a better plane. And the thinking has to start with how you think about you.”

Let’s raise our thoughts. We Can. We Must. We Will. And if I may add, We Are.

As-Salaam Alaikum!


If we say we believe in a Higher Power, we should be able to identify what the mustard seed in our life is. It took me some time to identify mine. However, I am thankful for the Nation of Islam for showing me how beautiful Black is. Not just my Black skin, but the color (characteristics) of being Black has given me so much purpose.  

Divine Change

Our life’s journey is Divine.

(of or relating to a god, especially the Supreme Being) proceeding from God or a god: divine laws; divine guidance. extremely good; unusually lovely

This is just a few understanding of what Divine means. A beautiful word bestowed by the creator to his created. But it is also our attribute as beings of the creator. So when we think of ourselves, how do we really?  Do we think we are unusually lovely? Do we think we proceeded from God? Questions we really need to start asking ourselves. Diving deep into the mystery of self, we are as the Bible teaches the sons and daughters of God yet we refuse to accept or even acknowledge the Divinity within us. We deny God (self), why would we knowingly deny God (self)?

Is this a question for teachings or upbringing or dogmas that have been passed down. Which is it? And why do we attach it to ourselves? How many layers do we have to peel away to accept Divinity? And how will we handle it when we are at the core and find it to be true?

I find myself asking so many question. But where to look for my answers? Books? Teachers? Parents? Peers? Siblings? Family? Media? There seems to be a never ending source to get information. But is it relevant? Is it truth and how do we discern?

My thoughts take me into these places, places I assume others go into as well. My thoughts are on God and of God. And in my thinking, amazing things happen. By asking specific questions, you are ready to learn. Who are YOU? Who is GOD? Do YOU know who YOU are? Do YOU believe in who YOU are? If  I tell you we are God. How would you receive it, how would you react? What kind of fight would you be having within yourself to accept truth? After being condition for so long how could this be? How and why would anyone make such an assumption to even think that they are. Who would dare attach divinity to themselves? But I ask the question why not? I find that left in thought, if it is lofty and for the greater good, I receive answers in visions or with that quiet voice that warns and guides. I find that what I have been searching for has always been with me and could never depart, because in its departure is my departure. In it’s discovery I find my true self, my God self, what we are by nature. But we have been acting other than our nature because we did not look that closely within. And in this discovery a change starts to take place, it blossoms and it is beautiful. It will fuel you to do and create because we are God’s hand and feet in the physical word, the tangible world. We discover that we are spiritual beings having a human experience, or some might say we are human beings having a spiritual experience and the human experience is so beautiful, it continues generations after generations because God willed it so. But however you look at it, at our core we will always be God, accept or deny you cannot change it.

I conclude this written with Change defining before preceding.

Change – to make the form, nature, content, future course, etc., of (something) different from what it is or from what it would be if left alone: to change one’s name; to change one’s opinion; to change the course of history. To transform or convert (usually followed by into, to substitute another or others for; exchange for something else, usually of the same kind: She changed her shoes when she got home from the office; to give and take reciprocally; interchange: to change places with someone.

So now that we have a little more understanding about change. How is this relevant? Well a great teacher said how can we know anything without proper definition, so clarity is a must. So we now know that we are Divine and the core of us is God. Change is a must! We no longer look outside of ourself to cast blame or disappointment. We take up the mantle we take the responsibility  and be productive co- creators. Accepting that we can and will change for the greater good is a good start.  Accepting that we decide everyday what we will and will not do creates our life’s experience. Accepting that we decide how to react and respond to every situation determines how we communicate with one another. We have this, it is our ability to do and see that we are doing, it is a conscious shift to say I will do better now. We have been given what we need to create wisely and with discernment. So let US discern wisely and with knowing intent to do better NOW!

Infinite Peace and Blessings of abundance to all.

Ramadan Goals, Productivity, & Tips

Proper preparation prevents poor performance.

– Anonymous

Ramadan Mubarak (Blessed Ramadan)!

This is my fourth Ramadan and it’s the one of the best I’ve experienced thus far, Masha’Allah! This year, I actually took some time to prepare. Not as much as I wanted, however, I tend to be hard on myself. Therefore, that’s one of the things I am releasing Insha’Allah (God Willing) during this time of the year. Want to know how I prepared?

  • Goal Setting
  • Food Preparation (barely)
  • Made up mind!

Let’s get into the goals I set – I know this post is late, but it’s still relevant as we conquer the last 20 days. That’s right! It’s not too late to set goals.

Ramadan Goals

Below are the concrete goals I set for Ramadan:

  1. Expressing Gratitude
  2. Experience Ramadan with Believers
  3. Confront fears and anything holding me back
  4. Stay on track with reading The Holy Qur’an
  5. Be Productive
  6. Journaling

Expressing Gratitude

We as a people don’t show gratitude enough. This year I am showing my gratitude more and I hope to continue to carry this forward. I am so blessed to be able to participate in Ramadan and partake in the fast. Yes, I am thanking Allah for allowing me the gift of fasting.

Experience Ramadan with Believers

This is also a part of me expressing my gratitude. In the past, I made this month about me growing closer to Allah and improving self. However, I did not focus on building bonds with my family. Not just my Believing family. I want to share my Ramadan experience more with my household, although our beliefs are different. I think I’ve partially done this in the past, however, this year I am soaking up their love.

Looking at the urgency of the world, it is pushing me toward growing closer to the Believing family. This is helping me to appreciate them more and now the need to practice our faith together has increased.

When it comes to me doing everything on my own, I’m learning that some things are better done with family.

I am learning to make more time for family, while I’m also working to be successful. I need to fulfill my purpose and I need family along the way to share my happiness with.

What’s wonderful is on day one of Ramadan, I broke fast with a Believing family. Besides The Night of Power, I have not broke fast with Believers before during Ramadan. It was a beautiful experience and I look forward to continue doing this throughout the month. It appears to be Saturday’s for the day of manna (spiritual & physical food) with those who are dear to me.

Confront fears and anything holding me back

We oftentimes don’t realize we have a fear about a thing until a situation arises. However, as I become more in-tuned with self, I’m beginning to understand what my barriers are even before coming across a barrier (and in some cases, I don’t see them coming, but I’m still learning). For all of the obstacles I’ve already faced, I’m re-addressing them to ensure I don’t experience the same trial and to release the pressure.

During Ramadan sometimes we’ll tell people “Ramadan Mubarak” as a way to dismiss having a conversation. However, Ramadan is a great time to confront. Let’s understand “confront”.

confront: to present for acknowledgment, contradiction, etc.; set face to face, to bring together for examination or comparison

Sounds like atonement to me.

8 Steps of Atonement

  1. Point out the wrong.
  2. Acknowledge the wrong.
  3. Confess the fault.
  4. Repent.
  5. Atone.
  6. Forgive.
  7. Reconcile and Restore.
  8. Perfect Union with God.

So with the days we have left (and beyond), lets confront so that we may atone.

Stay on track with reading The Holy Qur’an

I am not going to get too far behind when it comes to reading The Holy Qur’an. I said I wasn’t going to get behind at all. However, I had to read three parts in one day, so I still need to ensure I’m balancing ALL of my priorities with God at the center and first to every goal. Good thing is, I’m all caught up and I’m going to finish reading The Holy Qur’an on time this Ramadan. I pray you do too!

If you do get off track, it’s okay. You can catch back up. Just divide the sections so that you can continue reading a part a day.img_0371

When I do stay on track: I feed on The Word after prayer, while I’m commuting, taking a break at work and/or while my food is preparing. This has been best for me. Find what works for you. Let’s read together because it helps us be on a higher frequency together. Together does not necessarily mean that I read a part and you. It means that while you’re reading in your space, I am also reading in mine. And when we engage in dialogue it tends to elevated. Therefore, if we feed on The Word together our bond and unison increases.

One of my favorite experiences this year  is reading The Holy Qur’an with a dear Sister of mine.

Be Productive 

Part of the reason why I got behind is because I’m working on my purpose during this month. However, I know that my gifts have zero value when I don’t put them second to Allah. So I’m keeping Him first, especially with what my responsibility is to him as priority and then I’m working on completing my goals.

Progress towards my goals are looking great this month. I pray the same for you.
Being productive helps you stay awoke. The only time I feel very exhausted is when I’m commuting on the train or sitting still for too long. If you know me, you know I get about 3-4 hours asleep. So I have no choice but to be productive.

Productivity boosts energy.

Journaling

Since I love writing, I’m constantly thinking of ways I can turn my reflective thoughts into purpose. Therefore I brought a journal to take note of my daily learnings, readings, and reflections. It’s been helpful to access where I’m at with progress towards my goals and my nearness with Allah. It will definitely be helpful for next year because I have a bunch of ayats (verses) written out for reminders, personal duas (informal prayers of supplication for use in a range of situations, in most cases they are personal prayers), inspiration (I am writing my favorite verses), a brief explanation of what my experience is like on each day. Tracking my growth, allows me to see how far I’ve come. So all though I have a Ramadan journal, I now have a sacred reference point for one of the best times of the year to get me through trying times.


That’s what’s working for me. We still have a ways to go, so I want you to put some tools in your kit.

Below are a few reminders and tips I took from How to Prepare for Ramadan (video):

  1. Prepare to be more obedient to Allah.
  2. More Sunnah & Less Haram.
  3. Put the Fard ahead of everything!
  4. Continue your efforts after Ramadan.
  5. The day of Eid is a test for you.

Now for some humor, but a reflective self-check: Watch this hilarious short 10-minute film. It simultaneously shows the difference between a productive and non-productive Believer while engaging in Ramadan.

Fight the madness of life with the calmness of Salat.

Don’t necessarily countdown, but plan ahead for the person you want to be once Ramadan has passed. You have 20 days to manifest that person. We manifest a new thing with a thought, so don’t tell me you can’t do it. Let’s go!